I'm leaving on a jet plane.

6/26/07 - 2:12 AM PST

My little monitor is providing the following information:

Altitude: 35000 feet
Ground speed: 555mph
Outside temperature: -50 degrees celsius
Distance to destination: 2405 miles
Time remaining: 4 hours 54 minutes

All of which is relatively useless and extremely depressing.

So apparently I'm a frequent flyer or something, allowing me to have Eva Air Silver Club membership. This means absolutely nothing except that I'm allowed lounge access, which is equivalent to free internet and tea eggs, among other things. I ate like four eggs (much to my mother's dismay), and took 3 mini water bottles and several tiny tuna sandwiches for the epic journey. Would have gotten some Lays and Oreos as well but I was under the watchful eye of Mommy "Why are you so fat" Wu.

Airplane bathrooms are so questionable. I always get scared when the toilet goes WHOOSH. I mean, even though I'm the one flushing it, so I kind of know it's coming but that has always frightened me.

The person behind me totally stuck his nasty feet up onto my armrest. I mean I don't have cute feet myself so I don't judge, but at least I have some common courtesy and I don't stick my feet up into other people's business.

I hate airplane food. Not to the extent of my hatred of ketchup, but it's pretty high up there on my hate list. Chinese airline food especially. Well, I can't remember the last time I've been on a long haul flight that wasn't Eva Air or something, so I can't judge what say, Southwest Airlines serves. But we always get these totally questionable things of like, braised beef with curry sauce or equally unappealing sounding/looking/tasting food. Even the bread rolls are usually lacking. On occasion, there is some ice cream cup that is my saving grace.

You know what though? I don't understand why it's so difficult to make a decent airplane meal. I mean, I buy $2 microwaveable TV dinners at Safeway all the time of fettucine alfredo or chicken and rice that taste perfectly delightful. This is the only time that I will eat cuponoodle (which I can proudly say I have not eaten a single one of all year in college). Currently I'm having to survive on little snack bags of "mixed nuts and rice crackers" as well as my tiny tuna sandwiches, which we all know are not enough to sustain me through the 12 hour flight.